"Parents are nothing but big kids until their kids drag them into adulthood (usually with a lot of fuss and a lot of screaming)" Stephen King
It is almost impossible, whether we are talking about an adult or a child, that he has never screamed.
Why?
Because screaming expresses strong emotions of joy, but mostly anger and frustration.
What are the effects of screaming?
◦ Difficulty concentrating
◦ Anxiety
◦ Withdrawal
◦ Behavioral problems
◦ Low self-esteem
◦ Greater risk of depression
◦ Sleep problems.
How can we control screaming?
◦ By clearly expressing what is disturbing, namely the behavior and not the child himself.
◦ Think before you act.
◦ Wait until you are calm, practice relaxation techniques.
◦ Admit that sometimes you yell more than you'd like.
◦ Adjust your expectations according to the child's age.
◦ Follow the rules you set.
◦ Pay attention to the situation that makes you scream.
◦ Builds a solid bond with the child.
How to be a better parent?
◦ Let the child make mistakes
◦ Teach him values and not rules
◦ Encourages creativity
◦ Don't discipline inappropriate behavior, explain why it's wrong
◦ Praise the child and not just his actions
◦ Don't be hard on yourself and forgive your mistakes that are temporary and don't identify you
◦ Trust your instincts, live for and with your family and not for others
◦ Ask for help and support, you need breaks for yourself and your life partner
◦ Be a role model and apologize when you yell
◦ Show love whenever you get the chance.
The parent sometimes feels overwhelmed by negative emotions and anger. However, yelling can be a healthy part of a relationship when criticism, defensiveness, and contempt are not present.
Avoid unwanted behavior by making eye contact, stand face to face with the child and put your hand on his shoulder, this way you will connect with each other and achieve results in the requested tasks without conflict, refusal or yelling.
Screaming raises walls, assertive communication unites souls!
Carmen Mariana Ardeleanu, psychologist
